ASK YOURSELF

In all of the following relationship dynamics we are at risk for developing stress that can lead to anxiety and depression which may often be accompanied by physical symptoms at varying degrees of severity. The stress we feel may influence other relationships and activities due to our inability to cope well with our circumstances.

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” 
― Maya Angelou

 

 

Romantic Couple Questions

When confusion and misunderstandings become a part of our thought processes, this is our clue that something may be out of alignment in the way we are relating to our loved one. The following are just a few questions indicating a rift in your partnership.     

  • Do you feel lonely?
  • Do you want to be closer emotionally? 
  • Do you feel like you don’t know them anymore in the way you used to?
  • Do you think you are doing something wrong but you don’t know how to fix it?
  • Are you arguing about insignificant things?
  • Has something terrible happened and you have lost trust? 

 If you answered yes to any of the above questions or by reading you have become aware of specific doubts in your own relationship, then I would like to help you find a way to connect in a way that will make you feel safe and loved by your partner.       


Family Relationship Questions

Family dynamics are difficult and we can get hurt because we have the expectation that loving each other should be enough. Sometimes, though, our behaviors can give a very strong message that makes our family member feel unloved, misunderstood and sometimes unwanted. It becomes necessary at this point to take a look at what we are doing in our dynamic with each other that is creating difficulty and turmoil and in turn may be causing hurt, frustration and anger at times.     

  • Do you feel as though you are not being understood?
  • Do you feel that you are being controlled and you want a sense of freedom?
  • Do you feel that you don’t have the right to speak up about your needs?
  • Are you being told what you have done wrong and don’t feel that you are doing anything wrong?
  • Do you feel that you are not experiencing behaviors that would indicate that they have your best interest at heart?
  • Have you been lied to or deceived and you have lost trust?
  • Do you just want a chance to offer your viewpoint and they are not willing to listen? 

Let me help you come to deeper understanding about yourself and your family member and bring the relationship that you feel you should have into view. 


Other Relationships

We have many relationships in our lives that can be important to us for very sound reasons and a problem arising may cause difficulties that we want or need to overcome. 

Friends: sometimes our friendships are such an integral part of our lives. These relationships are well worth cultivating and maintaining. When something happens and there is an attachment disruption, we can take steps to repair the relationship and continue to enjoy the benefits of friendship.  We don't have to just move on and decide that we can just find someone else to love in that way. It might happen but that does not mean that the relationship you have already cultivated is not worth keeping.   

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Ex-partners: When we do end up breaking up with a partner and their are children or in-laws involved who still want us in their lives, we may need a way to start a new relationship as co-parents or friends or family in a different way because we can not sever the ties between us. Without a doubt when children are involved it is imperative that we move forward with the greatest ease not just for ourselves but for the children. I can help you find a way to resolve the arising problems and even learn a new way to interact that can be a pleasant rewarding experience. 

In-laws:  These relationships are often developed over time and we may not be willing to grieve an unnecessary loss.                       

  • Have you developed a special relationship with a parent or sibling, niece, nephew, cousin?
  • Do you love your in-laws and do they love you?
  • Do all of you want to continue your relationships but feel you would be disloyal?
  • Do you wish you didn’t have to get caught in the middle?

Co-workers:  Often times relationships with a co-workers or our superiors at work do not call for both to come into therapy, however, doing some individual therapy may help you to gain perspective and make better decisions that lead to your own contentment in the workplace or help you make a decision to leave an unhealthy environment.